Sunday, January 10, 2010
is, I suspect, best done in a bad mood. Failing that, a questioning mood. Why do I keep all this stuff? Why don't I tidy up as I go along? Why do I feel as if I want to work larger than I have been? Do I really need all this fabric? Where can I put all these books? You know the kind of thing, I'm sure. It helps you to throw things away, or give them to others, which makes it easier to find places to put things; and that, in turn, gets things clearer in your mind. I write about it at length in the Creative Focus book. At times like this, I rather think I should be taking a large dose of my own medicine.
And that really is what I intend to do. I spent an hour in one of the fabric studios today, and it still looks like a large bomb hit it. Partly that's because my son has several boxes of his stuff, mainly books (wonder who he gets that from...?), in that particular studio. They're going back up to Scotland just as soon as I can manage it (mwahaha...). But it's also my doing. There is a lovely (or rather, unlovely) guddle in both cloth studios, and I'm sick of it. So the next few days will be partly spent working on putting things to rights, and the rest of the time spent telling the cats that I didn't order the snow up just to spite them, and that there's plenty of food in their bowls...in between cuddles, of course.
That 'work larger' thing is intriguing, though. Partly it's just Bertha's influence. Partly, though, it's a need to give myself the space to express things, as I do in my paintings. I don't like painting small, and I no longer feel I want to sew small, either. And partly it's the restlessness that you get at the beginning of a new phase of work, as you wonder, is it worth it? Do I really want to do that? Say that? Express that? Will I be able to do the theme justice? I don't know any of that. But I do trust the process, and at the moment, the process seems to be saying, tidy up, get ready to work, get out of your own way, and hurry up about it. So that's what I'm doing. Wish me luck, it's scary.