Thursday, September 20, 2007
metaphorically speaking. You know the saying, 'when life hands you lemons, make lemonade'. Well, I thought I'd tell you the story of how I struggled with my inner critic and won...in a manner of speaking.
Yesterday I created an Etsy shop. I've been talking about it, thinking about it, tying myself up in knots about it for a very long time, but yesterday , I bit the bullet. Now, usually' if I do something like that, I prepare really well, do all the thinking beforehand, then commit. Yesterday, I committed first, and worried about it later. My, did I worry! My photos aren't good enough...my work isn't good enough...you get the drift...over and over. This morning, I was in a slump, thinking I should have read the small print, and generally berating myself for overstepping some mark or other. And so, in a right tizzy (as they say in the part of Scotland I come from), I decided that, as the cloth I had upstairs was awful (told you it was a tizzy!), I might as well overdye it.
And that's when I started making lemonade from my self induced lemons...tizzies are full of energy, after all. As I sorted through the fabric, I found a couple of bits that were interesting, and started combining them at random with other things that seemed to go with them, that were lying around. I now have two completed tops, one of which I'm really pleased with, and a little quilt called Monument, which is pictured here. It's 10" by 17", a bit longer than a journal quilt, and it's made from a couple of bits of commercial fabric and a piece of my handdye, which I'd overprinted (looks like a monoprint, but I can't honestly remember). Together, they seem to work...they even work the other way up (which was the way I had intended them, until I turned it round to look at it, and liked it better upside down!). And along the way, I thought about developing a class around my particular take on impro quilting (also known as making it up as you go along...). I think it would be fun!
I think what I'm trying to say is that we think our emotions, our moods, our feelings are in charge of us. I think it's the other way round; if we don't assume that anger, or depression, or other negative feelings stop us doing things, then we can use the energy we're generating to get on with some work...which gives us good feelings...and we break the cycle of down, down, and deeper down. So I'm going to put this wee thing on Etsy, too, and see what happens. Maybe nothing...maybe something...lets wait and see!
ps I still don't feel great about my Etsy shop...but that's going to change, too!! Which is what I meant by beating the inner critic 'in a manner of speaking'; I didn't get rid of the initial bad feelings, but I did get something good out of them. Least I think it's good...