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Wednesday, February 21, 2007

I Was Struck...



by Felicity's comment yesterday. She said, 'I wonder sometimes if depression is seeing things exactly as they are and 'normality' (governed by society) is self delusion (trying not to think of the things that we really should by busying ourselves with endless distraction).


I think, myself, that depression is an illness, as opposed to a state of mind...if you see what I mean. When I'm depressed, I see the world in a different light altogether. There is no hope, no light, no joy, only the promise of more of the same. My work seems worthless; my self, even more so. When the depression is under control, I recognise the beauties of the world, and that I am worth something, rather than nothing. I recognise that I am loved, and that I love in return. There might even be hope...


Tidying up, I found an old disc from 1999, hence the (rather poor) picture. The piece is in guid Scots wool, a semi abstract landscape, 'Heart Of The Country'. It's a reminder of what I used to do, and how differently I work now, but I still have a sneaking fondness for it, even though I can't even remember what happened to it...

7 comments:

Anna Nowicki said...

I so agree with your thoughts on depression - right now I feel I am beginning to slip in that direction again! Keep positive. Anna

Frederique said...

Great job!

Dianne said...

I like the scottish wool, its amasig how we change, grow, see thing and do things differently.
But that is what life is all about.
We recognize you beauty and talent every day... Big hugs

Felicity said...

I hope it didn't sound too flippant Marion. I find the debate on whether childhood depression exists interesting (and frustrating) because I would say from the age of 5, that's what I had. That and the post natel depression made me think, looking back, that there was a certain clarity with depression (at least for me) but reading your post I do agree that it is, sadly, without beauty and hope.

Caitlin said...

Depression is not a "state of mind" for me - believe me, if I could CHOOSE not to be depressed, I would, in a heartbeat - it is, as you say, an illness. And it's particularly debilitating because it stops us from doing the things we normally do. And if one more person tries to tell me "snap out of it" or equivalent words, I may take an axe to them. or, I would if I could get up the energy to find an axe and get angry... arrrrgh. Some days I feel like there is not only no hope right now buit there will never be any hope ever again. Somehow there always is...

Barbara said...

wonderful blog. I am just a beginner and you give me many inspirations. Thanks Barbara

Anne Wiens said...

Hi Marion-

I've found that a piece does sometimes gain esteem by being tucked away and forgotten for a time. I chalk it up to my inital disappointment that it didn't turn out as I thought it should. Once I forget what I should have done, I can just enjoy what I did.